Sunshine seems afraid of me;
avoiding my gaze and cowering away
she left me to her brother Shadow.
I see her golden flecks shimmer on the skin of my friends and foes alike;
gentle buzzing on a milky lake
I am cool in the shade
and don’t long for beating heat
or ache for that cloaking warmth
until I think about it.
and when I think about it
I feel as though I am on fire.
Sometimes I wonder how she chooses where her light lands;
how she decides who gets kissed by her rays and who is shunned away into the dark.
Perhaps I have some look in my eye like I am longing to be alone, or maybe she sees something in me… some dirty twisted sick
secret that makes her recoil.
Maybe that’s why Sunshine seems afraid of me: maybe I am not worthy of her light.
Brother Shadow is fine enough; he keeps me cool and I don’t get get burned but I do yearn
and to yearn is for the soul to cry.
I wish she would choose me,
I wish I could feel her golden flecks shimmer on my skin and that she would let me in
to the land of the light.